I think 4 things are necessary to help children in improving their behavior towards their mothers
1. Understand her
They need to understand her better, and try to empathize with what she is going through day by day and how their actions and words can affect her
2. Know her status that Allah has given her and Why
They need to understand not only how high she is but also why they must give her that honor and respect.
InshaAllah if they begin to understand the WHY, shaitan will not be able to deviate them with excuses. Often we hear questions such as I don’t owe them anything. Its their job to raise me. This just shows that, even though they knew, but they never truly understood what they owe their mother and what is her status. And since their understanding was weak, it was easy for shaitan to deceive them
Children today don‘t have reference,esp among their peers on how we should behave towards our parents. Infact often their peers maybe even worse, so they think what I am doing is okay. We also often just accept disrespect and hence for all these reasons and more, our standards have just become really low.
They NEED Inspirational examples from the true stories of the righteous people, the companions and the Prophets, to raise their standards. Have a reference of what it really means to honor your parents.
4. How to?
Children often can’t figure out what are the exact steps they need to take to honor their parents. Even when they want to honor their parents, they don’t always know exactly what that entails. What steps do I need to take? Is cleaning my room enough? Does it also mean that I have to stay quite if i feel mom is being unfair? Shouldn’t I fight her for whats fair? Does it also mean I shouldn’t let anger fester in my heart about my mom? What if I feel I know more than her? What does it mean to lower the wing of humility? They don’t automatically link being responsible in their homework or Salah or their chores to being good to you. We need to go deeper into these actions, the dos and don’ts of honoring your mother.
This is the foundation of what I have covered in the My guide to my mother’s heart video program. Each video fits into one or more of the 4 categories above. They are about understand the mother, empathising with her, knowing her status, understanding why we owe her so much, being inspired by the stories of great men, and last every single video is calling for an action, or answers a very common question children and especially teens may have. There is no video in there, which is just there without any purpose.
And lastly why is it so important
Their success in both this dunya and akhira depends on it.
If they can’t thank you and honor you today, when you are in front of you doing everything for them, then how ill they thank Allah(swt) whom they can’t even see??
If they can’t humble themselves towards you then how will they towards Allah(swt)?
If they can’t be patient with your decisions that deep down they know are right, then how will they be patient with the will of Allah(swt)?
If they can’t leave their desires for you, then how will they for Allah(swt)??
Serving you as they grow up, is in many ways a practice ground for them to serve Allah(swt)
We need to teach them to honor you, their mother, serve you, not because of your happiness, but so that they can attain the pleasure of Allah(swt)
This program has the potential to truly change the direction of any child’s life, completely transform the way they act with you and look at you. This is one program which can InshaAllah bring you lifetime of happiness and bring you even closer to your children .